SUCKONOMIX
The Hidden Side of Being Poor
Research has shown me it’s the little things that hold the key to successful career advancement. For instance - making a good first impression. This is more important than ever in a tough economy. You have to set yourself apart from the pack.
My advice to anyone starting a new job is to take a picture of your right foot, print out cards with the close-up picture of the foot on the front and on the inside: “Wanted to get off on the right foot!”
People love stupid little shit like that.
Another good way to express yourself, show some personality and exert authority in an unfamiliar and new work setting is to convene a meeting in the conference room, announce you’re “bringing something special to the table” and then take your cock out and put it on the conference table and introduce it to everybody. (Men only) (Preferably do this via video conference as well)
Also, take a shower! And wear clean clothes the first couple days! Sure, you need to keep your laundry costs down - we all do! But don’t start wearing the same thing every day until like the second week and you’ll be on the road to The Top!
